fucking,,,, just found out jack spent like 30 mins in walmart smelling shampoos bc i asked him to grab me some when he went but forgot to tell him what brand,,, like who the fuck,,,, why is he the way that he is,,,, he fucking got the right brand too that’s the worst part like IT WORKED
i hate this post because i think of it every time i’m high and get thirsty. every time my stoned ass is toddling off in search of water like winnie the pooh looking for a pot of honey this stupid ass reply comes to the forefront of my mind and i’m drinking while remembering i am in fact a dehydrated high motherfucker and i need to shut up
it’s easier to say “the universe” when I’m talking about a divine entity or higher power….the universe feels more patient and forgiving than the god I grew up learning about
at least you know the universe can be good AND bad
with god, there’s no real reason a benevolent creator would allow this much evil in the world
how do people get into relationships like how does that shit work like yall really confess your feelings to each other and bam you date? sounds impossible
my great-grandfather had to leave italy in the 20′s because he hit a fascist with a tuba, so if you think I am going to take this sitting down you are going to have to catch these hands and also this tuba
thor (2011) is an interesting movie to me because i think, despite a few flaws, the reason it never really took off the way iron man or cap:tfa did was because the audience it reached didn’t match the intended audience. the intended audience was so confused by what they saw because it didn’t reflect their ideal in terms of what they thought a thor movie would be, while the audience it ended up attracting claimed the empty spaces and turned their “sub-fandom” into something that practically rejected the fandoms of mcu!iron man and cap at that time
what i’m trying to say here, in essence, is this:
thor (2011) is a chick flick
to prove my point, i went to the world’s most trustworthy database on film analysis, urban dictionary, and found a few definitions obviously written by men
A film that indulges in the hopes and dreams of women and/or girls. A film that has a happy, fuzzy, ridiculously unrealistic ending.
word which refers to movies characteristically geered at young females in their twenties and late teens. Must include: love scenes, kissing, something sad, a happy ending
A sappy film that is generally geared towards women. It is always a love story, usually a comedy, and nausea inducing in men.
Term for a movie geared for women. Quite often seen on cable TV like The Hallmark Channel and endorsed by people like Oprah. These movies make women the heros and show life from a woman’s perspective. Most men hate these films cuz they are cheezy and dumb. Pussy-whipped men like them…or pretend to.
A movie that embodies all that is wrong with the world; a movie which displays a gross over-indulgence into, and exploration of, the workings of the female psyche and the accomanying emotional tendencies.
Pornography for women.
every complaint i have EVER seen about thor (2011) was about anything contained to earth: jane, darcy, not so much selvig, thor being hammer-less and learning to calm down and be gentle, women only liking it because hemsworth is a 6′3 outback steakhouse victoria’s filet mignon with twinkly dream eyes
but i think that’s because that’s the sentimental part of the movie, the emotional part. it’s driven by a romance and the intellect of a woman (arguably two). thor has to learn to get in touch with his softer side in a world that’s a bit more fragile than his own, furthermore there’s no other steaks– i, em, i mean men like him to balance out. there’s no male audience vessel in this movie
none
oh, you’re thinking selvig? i’m thinking not! there’s no male audience vessel.
men can’t relate to this movie
oh, you think they can relate to THOR? in the words of drax, “this is not a dude, you’re a dude. this… is a man”. thor is the ideal boyfriend figure, he belongs to everyone who wants a boyfriend, all the thor stans i know are women and/or like men, if you’re a thor stan and a straight guy i automatically have my suspicions and my eyes are guarded by red flags
#THOR 1 IS A SHAKEPEAREAN CHICK FLICK #THOR IS FOR WOMEN AND THE GAYS AND THAT’S JUST FACTS #the reason why thor’s been called unrelatable for so long was #cos cishet dudes could not fucking relate to him #COS HE A KING MADE OUT OF SUNSHINE WHO LEARNS AND APOLOGISES #FOR HIS MISTAKES #SOMETHING THEY’RE INCAPABLE OF (via @spacefloozy)
You had me at
hemsworth is a 6′3 outback steakhouse victoria’s filet mignon with twinkly dream eyes